it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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