u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize
