My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize