Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Randomize
