btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
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