I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I'm just crazy horny about you
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
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