we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
