she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Randomize