We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
I have post one night stand depression
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