just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
