Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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