Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
