I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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