There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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