Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Randomize
