he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
