This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Randomize