Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Randomize
