I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
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