When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
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