hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
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