My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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