How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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