I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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