oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
