Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Randomize
