ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
pray to the hookup gods
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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