i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
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