Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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