# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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