i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I would ride that face into the sunset
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
