He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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