so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Randomize