Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
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