Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize