he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
