That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize