I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Randomize
