It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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