u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
