I am in a vortex of obligation.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
