my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
