I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
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