how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
