I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Randomize
