Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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