I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize
