just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
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