Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
tell me about the eggs
Randomize