found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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