I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
